


You Wouldn't Know

by cleste09



Series: Malaysian GP 2013 [1]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-25
Updated: 2013-03-25
Packaged: 2017-12-06 12:21:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/735563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cleste09/pseuds/cleste09
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the Malaysian GP 2013. Sebastian's win was controversial and it left him feeling depressed and dejected. Kimi doesn't like to see his friend in such a state so what is he going to do about it? What is he hiding from him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Wouldn't Know

“He’s really a twat!”

“Yeap! How could he disobey those team orders?”

“Wasn’t it clear to him to hold station?”

“I don’t know but he seems to think he’s above the team...”

“Like he’s God or something?”

“He’s just being a prick. The race should be won by Webber.”

Sebastian slammed his hands on the table as he slammed his laptop shut. He was finding trouble by trying to look for some positive reviews about his race. They were filled with nasty comments, even after he had apologised.

Seb slumped back onto the back rest of the chair he was sitting on. He closed his eyes, recalling how he had felt when he saw Mark’s face. Anger and fury... They are not enough to describe the look on Mark’s face.

He knew he did something wrong. He disregarded team orders but he didn’t do it on purpose. What do they expect him to do? He’s a racer. He wants to win races. He’s built to win races, not to just follow his teammate home. Even Mark had disregarded team orders before so why was he getting all the hate?

He apologised. He wished time could be turned back so he wouldn’t repeat this mistake. But he couldn’t. He would have to deal with the consequences. He would have to deal with a very, very angry Mark and a very, very disappointed Christian and Adrian.

He sighed. He smacked his forehead. ‘What the fuck am I doing...’ he growled as he forced himself up from his seat. It was already 3am but he couldn’t sleep. The turmoil he’s feeling right now was unbearable. He just felt like... exploding.

He grabbed his stuff and left his hotel room. He went down to the bar to find it rather empty. The bartender was clearing up empty glasses when he saw Sebastian right in front of him.

“Erm, Sir, we’re about to close...” the bartender told him.

“Can you... can you just let me sit here and drink?” Sebastian asked. He really needed a drink.

The bartender recognised him. Who wouldn’t? He looked at how awful Sebastian looked and he knew he’s in a bad situation. Being a half F1 fan, he sighed. He would get some telling-off for doing so but it may be worth it.

“Okay... but only for an hour or so,” the bartender told Sebastian and he thanked him.

Sebastian ordered a few vodka shots. He vaguely remembered someone telling him vodka would temporarily solve some matters. He took a shot and smiled slightly. He remembered who told him that. The only person he could say openly that it’s his best friend in F1.

He continued downing 3 shots in one go. Mark’s voice saying “Multi 21!!!” kept ringing in his ears. Christian’s lecture right after the race also continued to ring in his ears. Everyone’s against him now. It’s not like it’s their fault. He caused all of this.

He asked for another 5 shots. The bartender obliged but he was worried that Sebastian might get really drunk. True enough, he was drunk only after the initial 4 shots. Sebastian was sobbing quietly, his face in his arms.

“What’s wrong with racing? I didn’t do it deliberately...” he mumbled. Tears were welling up fast in his eyes.

“I apologised... I said sorry. If I could change the result I would do so...” he continued on. The bartender nodded in reply.

“Why when Mark did this before, he didn’t get any reprimands or some sort of punishment? Why am I taking all the blow? Just because I’m the World Champion? I’m a racer... I want to win. What’s wrong with winning?’ he mumbled even faster. He was not making much sense and whatever he was saying was contradicting what he was saying before.

The bartender shook his head as he looked up and saw a figure behind Sebastian. The bartender nodded, recognising who was that.

The person waved his hand slightly to acknowledge the bartender and thanked him. The person grabbed onto Seb to help him up from his seat. Sebastian obviously tried to fend the person off him.

“Don’t take me away... I want more vodka...” he said with a voice filled with distress and it was obvious he was depressed.

“Seb, you idiot. You’re drunk,” the person growled at him when Sebastian managed to punch the person’s stomach.

Sebastian instantly recognised who it was. The voice was so familiar, his scent smelled like home.

“Kimi...” he mumbled, grinning slightly as he grabbed onto Kimi’s shoulders. He started laughing, making Kimi frown at him.

“What the fuck -” Kimi didn’t manage to finish his sentence when Sebastian stopped him from continuing on.

“I’m a joke, Kimi. A laughing stock. For not obeying orders. It’s my fault... Yes, I deserve whatever is thrown at me right now. But I have feelings too... I feel bad. I feel so sorry for Mark. I really do... But people still doubt meeeeeeeee.... They think I’m just acting like I’m sorreyyyyy...” Sebastian was dragging his words and he was still laughing.

Kimi shook his head. His heart did ache when he saw Sebastian in such a state.

“Don’t give a fuck of what people are saying to you. You know you’re at fault, then go try and rectify it. Make up for it. Disregard what the others say,” Kimi mumbled at him, heaving him up from the chair. He was thankful that Sebastian let him hold onto him.

Sebastian clung onto him, still laughing but it soon turned into sobs.

“I’m really sorry... I am...” he mumbled against Kimi’s neck and Kimi took the opportunity to hold him properly.

Kimi waved to the bartender, thanking him before helping Sebastian out of the bar. He took him back to his room. Sebastian was still sobbing as Kimi deposited him on the bed. He went to get a warm wet towel and wiped Sebastian’s face. He threw the towel aside and helped to tuck him into bed.

“Seb, stay strong. You can do this...” Kimi mumbled before planting a kiss on Sebastian’s forehead.

Kimi was really angry with what the media had said about Sebastian. Yes, he disobeyed orders but there’s no need to criticise him till that extent. He had his fair share of criticisms over the years so he knew what Sebastian must be feeling right now. Kimi himself have the ability to disregard everything and just focus on himself but he knows Sebastian is still struggling with this.

He really wanted to say something in defence for Sebastian to the media. He really wanted to but he couldn’t. It wasn’t his business, technically, but he just couldn’t bear seeing Sebastian so sad, so depressed, so broken...

Sebastian mumbled something but he had his eyes shut. Kimi looked down at him and knew he was asleep. He had seen Sebastian drunk a couple of times. He knew when he was asleep and when he’s not. Kimi tucked in beside him, hugging him slightly. He sighed. It really did hurt him seeing Sebastian in so much pain. He kissed him again on the forehead... and then on his lips.

_Sebastian would never notice... Sebastian wouldn’t know he kissed him... Sebastian wouldn’t know how much it hurts him to see him in such a bad state... Sebastian wouldn’t know... he loves him..._

...

The next morning came and Sebastian woke up with a terrible headache. It was back to reality, he thought to himself. He needed to face the consequences of his actions. He sat up on the bed, looking around the room. It wasn’t his room at all. He looked to his right to find a note, a bottle of water and 2 pills on it. He moved slightly to grab the note.

_“Seb,_

_I’m off to catch my flight. Stay strong. Disregard what others say. Eat the pills._

_Kimi”_

Sebastian smiled at the note. Forever economical with words. Kimi must had taken care of him the night before. He couldn’t recall what happened at the bar. He sighed, popping the 2 pills into his mouth. He swallowed them before getting up to head back to his room.

He can do this. He can solve this. He have to.

**Author's Note:**

> I might add a sequel or a next chapter to this. It depends. Oh, and thanks for reading! =)


End file.
